Humble Beginnings

"A tree so big that it takes both arms to surround starts out as the tiniest shoot;

A nine-story terrace rises up from a pile of dirt.

A high place one hundred, one thousand feet high begins from under your feet."

- Lines 7-9, Chapter 64, "Tao-Te Ching", Lao Tzu

(translated by Robert G. Henricks)

"The End"

I just finished watching a Deaf film from the UK titled "The End" that triggered in me an unexpected emotional response. The film is written and directed by Ted Evans, and is a faux-documentary that follows the lives of 4 Deaf children, over the course of 60 years. The synopsis of the film is as follows:

"Starting in the 1980's, drama 'The End' follows 4 Deaf children over 60 years. After the introduction of a treatment aimed at eradicating deafness, the very survival of Deaf language and culture is at stake. Featuring stunning visual effects and an ensemble cast, 'The End' is a thought-provoking alternative vision of the future."

The eerie, and equally tragic, thing about this film is that "the end" is entirely plausible; Deaf people all over the World are being "fixed" (in the eyes of those that do the "fixing") and the Deaf community, rich Culture, language, history and it's people are dwindling. I cried like a baby watching this film because although it's a mockumentary, this is a reality of many Deaf people's lives around the World. I knew about it in the past, but I'd never felt it like I did through this film.

If you can spare 20 minutes, I highly suggest watching it. Although it is presented in BSL (British Sign Language), there are subtitles for ASL-users and for the "signing-impaired" ;)

eu·gen·ics

noun (plural) /yo͞oˈjeniks/ The science of improving a human population by controlled breeding to increase the occurrence of desirable heritable characteristics. Developed largely by Francis Galton as a method of improving the human race, it fell into disfavor only after the perversion of its doctrines by the Nazis

So ironic that practicing eugenics on minority groups is entirely out of the question; absolutely unheard of! ... unless that group happens to be the Deaf community. As a hearing person, I cannot come close to understanding the Deaf experience and having to endure oppression on a daily basis- this film gave me only perhaps a fraction of a glimpse into how it must feel to watch the powers that be try and "fix" someone, who does not feel there is anything to be fixed. Let's hope for the future of all mankind, who can learn and benefit from one another despite racial/cultural/linguistic differences, that this film does not predict the way that things will End...

Watch it-

Gift Economy

"... anyone could be your family;

if they're not your blood family, they're related to you because they're human"

It dawned on me-

Wow... haven't written since August- hmm... well that's a bit unfortunate. I've always found writing to be a worthwhile outlet, have I really not felt something Powerful enough to warrant reflection in the past 2 months? What is happening here?!

I feel like I have been consumed in routine the past few months- I caution to use the word rut because of the negative connotation it carries, but now that I think about it, I guess you could say the past little while has been rather rut-like. It's odd really; the Pep-in-my-step, the swelling of my Heart, the embrace of the Here & Now feel at times as though they've slipped away. I didn't even notice the vacancy until I felt my Heart swell today & finally realized that these feelings had somehow retreated-

Now just to clarify, I'm not saying that I've been in a horrible depression for the last 2 months (I've got much to feel blessed about!), but I definitely haven't had the same appreciation, or is it understanding, for Life & the World as I did not too long ago. So what happened? I caught myself thinking about it today and it made me frustrated- "Why should I have to work to feel enlightened", to which my subconscious, ever the devils-advocate, piped up "Why shouldn't you have to work?!".

Hmmm... now that's a novel idea. Perhaps I had begun to take things for granted; to disregard the appreciation for the small moments of the day to day and simply expect to feel like I was walking on Cloud 9. There's people all over the World who dedicate their Lives to pausing and appreciating the beauty of our World and the energy that Life brings- look at Buddhist monks for example- why did I feel that it should come naturally to me without any thought? Did I become too comfortable in the feeling? Did I lose myself in the pettiness of the daily "grind"? I don't have an answer, but I do think I've recognized that I cannot simply expect to be Joyful and exuberant day in and day out, it takes Awareness, Effort, Appreciation- In one word, it takes Mindfulness.

My mind is swimming with a flurry of aspirations, reflections, dreams, thoughts and goals. There's too much flying around in there right now for me to sort out what's what and what goes where, but I think it would serve me well, on my continual path to self-discovery, if I started blogging again and actually acknowledging all that racket "up there". It sounds silly, but reading passages from Lao Tzu's "Tao Te Ching", really help put things in perspective for me; the significant from the trivial, the Wei from the "way". I've written it before and I'll write it again: only I have the ability to change my perspective. Turn the funk, into the funky (hey, I like that!) :)

And with that, I'll wrap-up this entry with a promise to myself to make the effort to regain those feelings that made me feel so inexplicably Wonderful. There's much Pondering and reflection to be done-